*[Adjective] Computer Worm [verb] Internet*

Update: Tried to fix formatting.

(In light of Andrew Conry-Murray's dig at vendor press releases, I thought it would be appropriate to dig up my shot at reporters, originally written in January, 2003 ;-)). Enjoy:

In the wee hours of [date], a [adjective] computer worm spread [adverb] throughout the Internet. Dubbed [silly name] because [ridiculous reason that doesn't explain anything about how it works], and also known as [another random name] and [another random name], the worm has infected an estimated [number] systems within [length of time]. Experts are calling this worm the most [adjective] since [date in the past].

The worm exploits a hole in [Microsoft product name] that was first identified [number] months ago by [security company name]. In an attempt to secure the planet, [same company] released detailed information about the vulnerability and how to exploit it. They also mentioned how to fix it, but apparently [noun] listened. Coincidentally, the worm that exploited this hole was also first identified by [same company]. Even more coincidentally, they make a product to protect against [noun].

"Actually, it's not really a [noun], it's a [noun]," said [Pete Lindstrom, or some other person seeking publicity]. "A true [noun] works by [random filler that nobody will read]."

The worm's payload [verb] every system by [verb ending in -ing] the [noun]. Comparatively speaking, this is much worse than [another worm] but not as bad as [another worm]. The computers of [place] were hit the hardest. Current damage is estimated at [dollar figure more than the GNP of two-thirds of the world's nations]. "This worm has the potential to [something or other]," said [Pete Lindstrom, or some other person trying hard to come up with something interesting to say ;-)]. "It just goes to show you that [another something or other]."

Though there is no way to protect against this particular bug, experts recommend trying [longshot one] or [longshot two], neither of which matter, since nobody will do it anyway.

Comments

[film izle]

flamenko thank web a
min money gr

[iyimi]

Wow. This is the first on your book reviews that I have ever read and I am very happy I did. Sometimes things can get a little vapid here and this was nice to read. I am taking the book with me on my Christmas cruise!!

[tatil]

So many things have come from his creation. Sales of Mountain Dew, Cheetoes, Pizza Delivery, Chessex dice company, just to name a few.

[tatil]

So many things have come from his creation. Sales of Mountain Dew, Cheetoes, Pizza Delivery, Chessex dice company, just to name a few.

[tatil yerleri]

SEO is elitist nonsense, the rules of which are constantly changing, and who gets to decide what the rules are?

[cappadocia]

and feeling like knocking someone out does not mean i’d do it just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy to know that they have to come here and wank BS, cause in real life they are a bunch a lazy scum of the earth trying to suck the worlds money out of it forever

[Account Deleted]

Sağlık So funny. I guess that every press release is based on some kind of stencil like this one.

[Fre Ek]

Love the computer humor, from Dilbert to this post. Thanks for the laugh! Would you have a look at my site as well @ http://goo.gl/5glBE